Thanksgiving

I have had a whole week of amazing awesomeness! So much so that I don't even know where to start...

Well, Thanksgiving was great. I got to spend the better part of a week with great friends, eating great food and just enjoying life. Who could ask for a better holiday!

We had a huge dinner for the holiday. Everyone helped out and we ended up with way too much food, all of which was vegan and tasty! Tofurkey, Field Roast, sweet potatoes, dressing, vegan mac n cheese, vegan meatloaf, garlic and kale, pot pie and so much more. I thought I would explode by the end!



People doin stuff:




Other events from my week in DC included a Drank Party, thrift store shopping, watching football, baking, dessert potlucks, shopping, over eating and shows. Some friends of mine played a show on Sunday night that was amazing. You should go listen to The Ambulars (I dont know how to to the link thing so here: http://www.myspace.com/theambulars ). My favorite song is Lighthouse. Even if I didn't know these kids personally I would still be excited about the band.

I saw this on the side of a bus and thought it was just silly.



I came back to New York very late Sunday night for a date to the opera. It was wonderful and I got to get all dressed up and have a fancy night out. The show was a work by Mozart called Le Nozze di Figaro. It was at the Metropolitan and to top it off I got to sit in the grand tier (It means I had one of the best seats in the house). I really enjoyed it and hope to be able to go again soon! I thankfully remembered to snap a photo just before running out the door.



My week only got better when I received a text telling me I had a place to live. I moved in two days ago. Its been nice having a room but things are tense and awkward with the new roomies. I thought they would be rad because they are young and vegan and straightedge but they eat tons of shitty food and invite their friend over to get drunk... its just weird. The girl who lives here also brought a cat home the other day. I'm not really into pets right now and I really hope she doesn't want me to have any part of its care. I don't even want a litter box in the bathroom because if she doesn't clean in then Ill have to smell it and I didn't bargain for that.... Whatever, it will be fine.

On the up side I have a bedroom. And a temporary bed until mine arrives next month!

I started working on my cross stitch again! I hope to finish it soon because I need to send it to my friend. Im sure he is wondering where his surprise is!!! This is what I have done so far.



Its about 30 hours of work so far, its extremely detailed. I have another three left and then Ill have to frame it and ship it down!

Ive also started working on letters to pen-pals. I like to include little trinkets in them so if you have any ideas or suggestions let me know!! I like homemade or personal things. Ive had a lot of suggestions for gift cards but its just not the feeling I'm going for.......

So far my list is:
Handmade Bookmarks
Teas/ Coffee
Chocolates/ Candy
Coins/ Currency
Maps
Recipes
Mix-Tapes
Poems
Pens/ Stationary
Dried Flowers/Leaves/Bark
Bubble Prints
Pins/Buttons
Handmade Cards/Envelopes

I'm finally reading again too! A friend let me borrow Watership Down and I am very excited about it. Its kind of like LOTR but with bunnies. I'm not very far into it but I like it!

Tomorrow I'm going to the museum, I'm not sure which one just yet but it should be fun. I alway enjoy going to the museum. And I have nothing planned for Sunday. Probably just another lazy day at home with my book. :)

Too Far.

There is no easy way to say this so Ill just go ahead and throw it out there: I am out of control and I have no idea how to get back to where I need to be.

Before you panic Ill say that its probably not nearly as bad as it sounds but I am ashamed of my behavior. I lost control drinking the other night. I dont really know what happened and I dont like that. This along with many other decisions I have made in the past few months has lead me to this conclusion.

I do not want to be a part of a culture that promotes that behavior and so I am stepping back and re-evaluating my life. Its disgusting to think that I had to be babysat and that I cant remember what I did. I do not like people like that, I do not want to be one of them, and I am making the decision not to be one.

What I need right now is stability and I dont have it. Im struggling with the adjustment to being in once place all the time and not being able to just walk away anymore.

It hard to shift from one life style to another and I know its going to take time. I feel like a teen again trying to figure out who I want to be and where I fit in everything.

So long story short: I need to apologize to a lot of people for my behavior and I intend to, very soon. I will no longer be consuming alcohol until I feel I have a handle on my life and actions.

In lighter news, I have been working on my cross stitch a lot. Its close to half finished. I should have it done in the next few weeks if all goes well!

Trey and I went to the movies the other day. We saw Where the Wild Things Are. I have to say that I was extremely disappointed! Aesthetically it was pleasing but other than that it was terrible!! Lack of story and a horrible message to children! The whole movies was pretty much about an abusive character who manipulates people and resorts to violence when he doesnt get his way and everyone is supposed to forgive and love him anyway! What the fuck kind of message is that for kids?!?!?! GRRR....

I have a job but it doesnt start until the end of the month. I need to figure out an income in the mean time but that shouldnt be too difficult!

New York is wonderful. I really like being here but Im eager to start school now. Im ready to be busy again with productive things not just killing time socializing.

Im losing a lot of weight but it seems to be healthy weight. Id be happy to keep the pounds I have but since that doesnt seems to be an option anymore......

So, I cant say how long Im going to keep this up. I feel strange keeping a blog now but if I feel inclined I will.....

Also, Ill have a camera again soon so if anything, youll get pictures.

"And You've Changed Some"

Its been a while. Over a month. Almost two....

Life is very different these days. I dont really know what else to say other than that. My days of travel are over and for now I am thankful.

What does life have in store for me? I have no idea. Well, thats not entirely true. I have a few ideas but we all know that that doesn't mean anything to me. Im still wanting to go to EMT school in January. That would be nice. I like learning skills. Ill travel again soon, dont doubt that for a second. But for now Im focused on settling into a life and nesting for a bit.

I like New York. It seems to suit me well. I am always busy here. Always. It seems that a day doesnt go by where I dont have a hundred things to do. Im comfortable with that because otherwise Im pretty sure Id be depressed.

But anyway, thats my life now. I live in Brooklyn. Im trying to find a place to live "long term" and I just got a job. I want a second job because I like being busy and because it wont pick up to full time until December.

So much has happened in the past two months and now Im drawing a blank and have nothing to talk about.....

Ive decided (again) what I want tattooed on my chest. Thats the big thing now, I guess. Once I have excess money lying around Id like to do that but that wont be for months. And Ill probably change my mind again before then. I have to help my mom pay for the whole staph infection thing and get settled here anyway.

Im picking up my camera from the shop tomorrow. I got it fixed so there should be pictures to come. Im considering doing the 365 project that tons of people are doing. I cant commit to every day though. I like once or twice a week better. Could be a good way to document my life now.

More than most other things Im thinking of and looking forward to nesting. Its silly, I know but I haven't been able to for so long! I want to have a kitchen stocked full of bulk foods: beans, lentils, rice, quinoa, nuts, dried fruit, oatmeal...etc. And to have another sour dough starter.... I keep thinking about how I want my room to look. Sparse. Just a bed, table, lamp, dresser and maybe a book shelf. Im over having stuff. My vice is clothing and I know this but outside of that, books and maybe a computer for convenience, I dont want or need anything. A good cross stitch is nice too though. (god, listen to me! Im like and old woman...ugh)

I havent been taking good care of myself lately. Stress does that to me. Ive been drinking far too much soya milk and today I finally noticed what it does to my body. Ive lost weight but my boob have gotten bigger because of the estrogen. Oops. Ill have to work on that. I like bigger boobs but not if its at the risk of being unhealthy.

Halloween was ok. I ended up dressed as a cultural stereotype and felt somewhat uncomfortable about that. I was supposed to be a mime because my original costume fell through. But it didnt work out and I just looked like a French girl. There are no photos to speak of. Sorry.

So thats life. Not terribly exciting.

I like this song. I always have.... Maybe you do too.

Since we last spoke things have changed. As usual. I cant be relied on to make up my mind and keep it. I am the queen of changing plans.

The plan now is to move to New York. I have my reasons and it seems like a good idea at this point.

Im running out of money and I really dont want to be stranded in Cambodia or any other country in a few months. The west coast sucks and I think NY and I would get along well. I mentioned it a few times to people that I was thinking about it and the news has spread like wildfire.

So as of right now its official. Of course it could change, it is me we are talking about, but I dont see many other options on the horizon. I need to find a place to live and a job to hold me over, which shouldnt be too difficult, to make me feel secure.

The plan is to get a job and go to EMT school. I think Id be good at it and I can take it anywhere which is important for someone like me.

I was hoping to leave Portland September 30th to scout out the scene in NYC but I have instead come down with a nasty staph infection. Its in my face and its fucking disgusting but there isnt much I can do at this point. I had an allergic reaction to the antibiotics and now Im covered in hives. Sexy. But whatever. It will go away in a few days and I can go back to my normal activities. It looks much worse than it really is.

Its been a boring few week outside the infection. I went to the beach for a day. And met my mom on Mt. Hood while she was camping but other than that its mostly been all about drama, illness, fixing bikes and watching DS9.

Ive watched about 20 hours of Star Trek. Cant complain. I love DS9.

I was supposed to get tattooed today but cant because of the staph so Im hanging out with my mom instead.

As always I have pictures to share but Im lazy and dont feel like dealing with uploading them. Maybe soon...


xoxox

DC was a blast. It was so great seeing so many wonderful people and getting to spend quality time with them. I made Indian food one night and hung out with everyone all together. A lot of my relationships have changed in the course of the past eight months but most were for the better. I made a lot of friends as well and Im always happy about that. I also watched the entire first season of True Blood. Vampires are so cool.

New York has been equally rewarding. Surprising, I know. While I haven't had enough time here to really get to know people I have seen some good friends, met people Id like to get to know better and eaten more vegan ice cream than I ever should have. Perfect if you ask me. As always I wish I had more time here but my life is all about moving and changing. Everything is temporary.

Tomorrow is my flight to Portland. Its been said a million times before and Ill say it again, Im nervous about going back. Things have changed a lot and Im not sure what it will mean for my time there. I have plans to see friends in Seattle and possibly SF but if I cant take it after the "family camping trip" Ive decided Ill make my way out to the East Coast again.

I am a fickle lady. Being back is messing with my mind and I don't know what I want anymore. Its great to have no obligation and to be able to do whatever tickles my fancy at any given moment but right now its a lot. Ive had a lot of fun so far and wish it could never end.

I have missed my friends and soon Ill realize how much I miss my family as well. This has put me into an existential crisis over my life.

What is more important to me: seeing the world and meeting new people? OR my connections with the people I care about?

I miss being known and knowing people. I miss having time and space to complete or work on projects. I miss making friends for more than a few days. I miss not lowering my standards for company because Im lonely (no one should assume this is them).

Dont get me wrong. I love traveling and seeing the world and Im no where near finished but maybe its time for a break. Who knows. Maybe in another week Ill change my mind again. Knowing me, that will be the case.

For now my excitement is getting the best of me. To see my family and friends and to shoot another SG set and to ride bikes...etc. etc. Yay!