I probably shouldn't be as bitter as I am but seriously, fuck christmas.
Grocery stores close early, if they open at all, everyone is busy with their families, people acquire useless crap that will only break and end up in a dump later. Not to mention that it is a christian holiday that is shoved down every one's throats.
My christmas eve has been spent walking to the store to get food so I can eat tomorrow, showering and trying to get rid of the nasty case of athletes foot I have from too much time in the hot tub. Fun. (I know, FWP.) I also drank a whole bottle of sparkling cider to myself. I would have preferred champagne but when staying in a straightedge house, its probably not a good idea to get drunk.
On the up side, I think I will end up spending tomorrow the way I want. The original plan was to hang out with the DPC (Dead Parent Club) watching movies and eating ourselves silly. But I haven't talked to Trey or Ian in days and I am not so sure that is what I want to do after all.
Christmas aside, things are going well. I have been very happy the past few days. I was unsure of my hair cut but I like it now. Its still a little short for me but it will grow and it looks good now too. I also got myself a little gift for the holiday today. I have a really heavy winter hat but I wanted something that was a little more versatile so I got a plain black beanie. I also got black hoop earrings. I always forget how much I like earrings.
Jake and I got to hangout for a day or so before he had to go to Virginia Beach to see his dad. Things are going well with us. There are plenty of things to talk about but its great to know that we will remain friends for a very long time.
The thing that takes the cake though, is my new tattoo!!! I have wanted this tattoo for a while but was waiting to get to Silver Spring as an extra tribute to my grandmother. She spent a lot of time in this area when she was young so I waited until now.
Miss Tina Pell did it and I am pleased with her work. It was a first traditional piece for both of us! I absolutely love it. I also absolutely love my grandma!
Mamo is a wild woman. For anyone who ever thought I was a little crazy, you should know that I get it honestly, from both Mamo and my mother. Mamo used to belly dance on cruise ships, chase young men around, rub elbows with the stars and more. And I am sure I don't even know half of it!
Anyway, I like my tattoo and my hair cut and hopefully I will like my christmas too.
I usually try to volunteer on christmas day but this year I totally forgot about it until it was too late. I have started to feel weird about choosing to volunteer on christmas day anyway. I mean, I can donate my time and help out any time of the year. I should but I don't. Everyone wants to do some good during the holidays even though they don't really think about it or care to think about it the rest of the year.
My privilage is something I try to be aware of so I can better understand my place in the world and how I affect others lives. But in that I have become somewhat hyper aware and now feel weird about being some white, upper middle class woman stepping in to make the world a better place.
DC is a poverty ridden city. Most of the people here are poor, minority groups and I feel strange stepping in to "help out" for a few hours, not knowing anything about the community or people here. I can speculate and try my best to relate but I will never truly know what it is like and therefore have no place telling the community what it needs.
I am aware that this is a slippery slope and I shouldn't let that stop me from trying to participate in something good. I just think it is important for me to completely explore my feelings and options before I make a regrettable decision.
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